The Other Secret Place

I was talking to a friend of mine today about online purity, and I wanted to share with you a solution I've found that really works for me. In the spirit of transparency, I'll tell you a little secret about me - I've struggled with online purity for years. Like many other men and women, adult content becomes a small dish of comfort food for your flesh at a young age, and it grows into a horrific holiday meal of "comfort food" that you end up maintaining throughout the years. I battled ending the addiction for years, but I could never find a solution to the problem. There are solutions our there, but you have to find the right one that helps you end your addiction.

Then the Lord gave me a solution. I bought a physical alarm clock I liked and replaced my phone by my bed with that alarm clock. I found one I liked and had features I needed so I didn't have an excuse not to use it. I began plugging in my phone at night in my kitchen and I haven't looked back since. I can't tell you how much peace I feel now as I plug in my phone and take control of my online purity. Even in that action, small as it may be, I get this feeling of victory and success. I love it. It's my choice to end it every night, and that control feels amazing. I love waking up in the morning, and choosing when I want to tap into the world around me instead of being forced to tap into society because of the alarm on my phone. And it's not just viewing online content before bed. With my phone in my kitchen, I'm not stuck doom scrolling before sleep or catching up on the latest season of Outlander. I'm forced to be with my thoughts, pray, recap the day, etc. I've found I usually sleep much better, fall asleep faster, and get deeper rest....the whole package.

The other thing that helped me was praying specifically that God would prevent the temptation and the severity of it. Thanks to Him, the temptation has been lessened and my choice to do the right thing has increased. I was reading through Matthew last winter, and I was reading the Lord's prayer when something dawned on me - He says "and lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil." Of course He doesn't tempt us, but I thought "why not pray that He deliver me from this evil?" He's King of Kings and Lord of Lords so why could He not prevent me from the hold of temptation?

A lot of people hear this alarm clock technique and tend to have reasons, some good, to not do it. Here's a few I've heard:

Reason: What if someone needs me and I'm not near my phone to help them?

Truth: A valid reason, but there is a solution. Turn your ringer on and up as loud as possible, and plug it in. The Lord is in charge of what happens, and He'll wake you up if you 're needed (He's woken me up before, trust me He has it)

Reason: I'm on call at night I need my phone.

Truth: This is a good reason, actually. The good news is your phone doesn't have to be far away, it could be in the next room. Just don't have it in the same room as your bed if possible.

Reason: That technique is used for teens and people that have problems with addiction. I feel like a child plugging it in in the kitchen.

Truth: I know what you mean. That feeling got me too in the beginning. But again, that is a lie the enemy is using to humiliate you into not helping yourself. We all need help - there's no shame in reverting to tried and true methods to help yourself.

I want to add in a disclaimer here. If I've learned anything from my purity journey, it's this: You can get all the advice, tips and tricks out there, but unless you actually want to help yourself, nothing will work for good. This is the same for any addiction, whether it's something as common as overeating or something more dangerous such as drugs or alcoholism. Unless you address the heart of the matter, the battle for your freedom will linger on.

Also, understand that the enemy studies you - he has to know who he's fighting against to know how to hurt you. He will put any "reason" in front of you to prevent you from conquering your mountain and walking in freedom. Every choice you make to put away the stumbling blocks and step into freedom in Jesus is a victory. Celebrate it!

Moral of the story: don't just buy the alarm clock - bring God into the problem too, because He is the solution.

Happy Tuesday, friends